It’s been 63 days since I was last at work. That’s the longest period of time I haven’t worked since my first year of university. At points, it didn’t seem that long but then again it also seemed longer. Today it was finally announced that Opticals can reopen again, which means I am heading back to work. Now that the weather is finally nice, I am not particularly happy about this, but I knew it was coming eventually. I thought I would reflect on the past 63 days, it was a crazy ride for me.
While technically March 25th was my last formal day, I was actually off the week before March Break. I haven’t worked since March 6th, but I did go in on the 25th to help wrap up the clinic for our shut down. That puts my quarantine time to 82 days. I did, however, spend the first two weeks just hanging out at home, shopping, and continuing on with my regular life. Things here were still open, but I was just fighting off a nasty flu bug.
The first official week of quarantine I was running around trying to finish my clinical for school. Things were so rushed, and it was really stressful. I didn’t know if I would pass the semester or not, how our exams would be held, or what the heck I would do with all my time. After writing my exam online, studying my butt off, and handing in my clinical, I finally felt like I could relax a bit. That was of course when the boredom set in.
Here is what I did to pass the time;
- Played 75+ hours in Animal Crossing
- Didn’t wash my hair for 5 days in a row, turns out it is still oily
- Learned that pyjamas are acceptable when you have nowhere to go
- Got really good at sleeping in
- Watched an obscene amount of Youtube and Netflix
- Doubted every decision I made in my life
- Just because they said I can go for a walk, doesn’t mean I want to
- Realized guys sometimes suck, and being alone is okay
- I learned how to write at home, a task that I LOATHED before
- I read around 15 new books
- Online shopping was something I did to pass the time, mostly browsing though
- I learned how to stamp metal bracelets and keychains
- I waited 5 weeks for a package to arrive
- Wrote over 10 penpal letters
- I sculpted many pins, keychains, and earrings
- Cleaned my desk area at least 4 times
- Opened up my own Etsy shop
- Painted a few tiny things
- Designed a brand for myself
- Continued routinely journaling
- Made many plates of nachos
- Learned how not to wash a car
- Reconnected with some amazing friends
- I can indeed survive off of fruit, carbs, and cheese
- Sold my products internationally
- Watched and fed the squirrels from my window
- Cleaned out the storage space
- Did porch hangouts with friends
- Cried over movie and book characters
- Realized my car doesn’t have a button to pop the trunk
- Watched astronauts launch into space with SpaceX
- Cut my Dad and Opa’s hair
- Picked weeds in the garden
- Realized that I was worthy of love and to be loved
- Opened the pool
- Propagated my bamboo plant
- Designed business cards
- Learned to love myself
I know for a lot of people this time was really stressful and pretty depressing. I had my fair share of breakdowns and feeling really trapped in my own house. When I finally got the email that we would be returning to work I was a mixed bag of emotions. The summer has finally come and I can sit outside and read all day. While I don’t really want to go back to work, and doing so means there will be a lot of changes in our jobs, I am happy to finally have a routine again. These past 82 days have been crappy but also so good for me mentally. I questioned every decision I ever made, and I realized that even though I’m not where I thought I would be at 26, I am so happy with myself.
It’s been so long since I’ve actually felt comfortable in my own body, and my mind. I know my downfalls, the areas I want to work on, and I embrace them. I know I have some quirky aspects about me but I love them too. I am finally able to show myself love and feel the love back in return. While there are a lot of awful things going on in the world, I just want to show love to everyone, and tell everyone to just do things that make you happy. We have such a short time on this world and I am determined to do what makes me happy, no matter what anyone thinks.
To everyone else still at home or those who are returning to work, remember to love yourself. I want everyone safe, and while masks and constant handwashing will keep us physically safe I want everyone to be mentally safe as well. Take time to contemplate your life, go through the emotions, have breakdowns and crying fits. Feel those emotions and embrace them. Then pick yourself back up and love yourself. This world needs a whole lot of love right now. Spread it.