Pre Birthday Feels
I can’t be the only 26-year-old who honestly never imagined my life turning out the way it did. I’m in no way bashing the life I have, I am proud of every flaw and every accomplishment that I have made. When I was growing up, maybe in junior high, I wanted to be married and with kids by the age of 22. I thought that these goals were attainable and something that I needed to have in order for my life to be successful. Boy oh boy was I ever wrong! With my 27th birthday less than a month away I thought it seemed appropriate to reflect on my 26th year of life. It was an interesting one for sure!
While I am not married, have children, own a house, or even have a boyfriend right now lol I am mostly content where I am in life. So often I wish that things would be different but if they were then I wouldn’t be who I am today without those experiences. For me, 26 had been the year where I have really accepted who I was and fought for what I believed was best for me. So often I struggled with who I was and the choices I made. The older I get the easier it is to realize this is who I am and find healthy ways to love myself.
Many people around my age are already homeowners, have children, and successful jobs. I hated seeing people succeed in their life when I felt like I was missing out, it was a big case of FOMO. I needed to stop this negative thinking and accept where I was in my life. Accepting this was honestly one of the best things for me mentally. I was able to appreciate the small things in life, not focus so much on being in a relationship and just be happy on my own. I spent so much of my life wanting to be married with kids that I forgot to just enjoy the moment now. I am proud to say that I worked a lot on this in my 26th year of life. While I still have days where I struggle, the majority of them are good, wholesome, and filled with pride.
I work every day to not be so hard on myself, to enjoy the day as it is, and to just be more positive with all aspects of life. I had to make some hard decisions this year, I broke some hearts, and trust, but I did it because it was best for me. If that wasn’t something that they couldn’t accept then I had to just move on. I can’t live my life trying to make everyone else around me without making myself happy first. That might sound selfish but it is so true.
While I am still nowhere close to wanting to be married or have children I am content with where I am now. Yes I might still be living at home, but I have a job that I love, I have friends who I adore, and the best family.
Post Birthday Feels
Since I never got around to editing this post and posting it, I might as well add my post birthday feels as well. Birthdays get less exciting the older you get, and while I had a lot of anxiety around my birthday this year, it was honestly a great one. My dad decorated the house for when I woke up, work was wonderful and we ate cupcakes, and in the evening I got to spend it with the people I love eating ice cream cake. I also got a few Indigo gift cards so how can one be upset?!
After my birthday passed, I wished that I didn’t get so worked up over it. I caused myself so much stress for nothing. I think this just goes to prove that sometimes things will feel like it’s the end of the world but if you just sit back and enjoy the ride it could still be good. Last year I did a lot of self discovery and in my 27th year of life I am going to continue that. I am happy with who I am today and where I am in life, and I want to continue loving myself and learning how to be more grounded. I can’t plan every moment of my life, and sometimes the best moments are the ones not planned. Here’s to another year, Who knows what will happen!